Alternative ideas you can use to start conversation or to add interest to speeches or presentations


Toilets Letters

Need more quotes? Extracts from books on Toilets


Urinal Etiquette

The mathematics of urinal etiquette would have been incomprehensible 50 years ago (21/28 December 2013, p 58). Back then, if you walked into the toilets with a friend you automatically peed in a urinal next to each other, so that nobody could interrupt your conversation.

If it was a trough urinal, a newcomer would ask everyone to shuffle up to make space. If overcrowding meant that you peed in a toilet cubicle you would "double up" if required.

If someone happened to see your member, so what? They would see it anyway in the changing room when you played sport or went to the pool. What has made men become so dysfunctional about performing a normal bodily function?


The first time I heard about the fly-in-the-urinal means of manipulating behaviour (22 June, p 32) was a story about a bar with a cure for unruly drunks. The bartender would wait until a particularly bad boy went to the toilet. There was a bare wire strung across the back of the urinal, and the bartender had a way to let a live cockroach run out on it. Of course it instantly became an irresistible moving target, but the wire was charged, and the miscreant got instant enlightenment.

From Reddit

During the Defenestration of Prague, when the Catholic Representatives were tossed out a window, they actually survived. They claimed they were saved by angels, but they lived by falling 70 ft into a pile of poop.

Who do you think put the poop there in the first place? "When you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all."

Holy shit.